“Try not to suck” – Joe Maddon, Chicago Cubs Manger
money line ♦
CUBBIES Even Money vs Pittsburgh Pirates
Prediction – Cubbies
I will never bet against the Cubs. I’ve been gambling for 3 years now and think I’ve bet the cubs 400 times. I wish I could add it all up, but I think they are my biggest winning team… that’s not saying a lot.
I was so pissed when the Cubbies traded Eloy Jimenez and those other guys for Quintana because I feel like that could be the worst move to make in baseball. The cubs are so good today because they gave up on drafting and trading pitchers and just focused on getting hitters. Basically, Theo Epstein is me if I was a GM. Chicks dig home runs and stolen bases not innings eaters and ground balls to the shortstop.
That being said, Quintana’s been solid for the Cubs and its starting to get to a point where every game matters more than the next. This guys gotta start becoming the pitcher that Theo thought he could be when he gave up arguably one of the best players for the next 15 years. Quintana’s 67-66 in his career so tonight’s a bigger game than initially thought. Does he want to go out to the bar after the game and say he’s a career .500 pitcher, or a career .505 (round that up to .510 and now you can round that up safely to .1000 pitcher)? That’s what I thought.
Cubs by 10 and we won’t even sweat it. Javy will go yard, Zobrist will make an intelligent play in the field, maddon will make a weird managing move that will work, and rizzo will continue to bounce back from that slump he suffered from the first month of the season.
By the way, I know I already made my prediction, but take away the first month and a half of the season and Rizzo might be the MVP. Nah, just kidding, just checked his stats and they are kind of yuckkk compared to Betts, Trout… basically everyone good… so I take that back.
Cubs by 11…. The more I think about it the more I like it and the more we’ll win babyyyyy!
Let’s make sure Quintana always has more wins than losses #QW>QL
spread ♦
Seskachuwan RoughRiders +7 vs Calgary Stampeders
Prediction: Seskachuwaaaan
I couldn’t care lessssss about these Stampeders, no one is messing with the Ruff Riders BABYYYYY.
Let’s set the scene for a second – 7am at Starbucks on your way to the stadium to get some pregame activities in before the big game tonight. Scraggly beard, wearing scratched sunglasses, decked out in Ruff Rider gear.
Hot blonde is standing behind the backup QB and she’s like “hey cool pants what’s the S stand for??”
He’s trying to be humble so he’s like “oh I play in the Canadian football league for Seskachuwan. We have a game tonight.. tryna be alert, you know??”
BG (Blonde Girl): Ohhh the riders?
BQB (Backup QB): Rufffff
BG: Rough? What do you mean? Are you on the Seskachuwan Riders?
BQB: RUFFFFFFFFFFF
BG: Can you stop barking at me, its like 7am?
BQB: RUFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF. Seskachuwan Rough Riders
*pulls out iPhone and plays anthem*
*Everyone in Starbucks starts chanting along, coffees being poured on everybody, money’s being thrown around*
Hope your imagination can do better than that GIF.
I just really don’t think a bunch of Stampeders are going to beat a bunch of Ruff Riders – whether it’s football or real life. I dare you to give us 7 points, Vegas, you jacknose. We’ll take that 7 points and only lose by 6 or fewer!!!
P.S – sorry for adding no real facts or insight… there was no need to
Chalk It Up 